Angkor Wat

Angkor Wat is the heart of Cambodia and one of the main reasons I wanted to come and explore this country.  It is a UNESCO world heritage site and absolutely jaw dropping.  25 years ago Angkor Wat had a total of 7650 people visited the site.  Last year 2.2 MILLION people visited the site (that’s almost the same number of visitors per day that they had in all of 1993) and hundreds every day flock there to experience the see the sun rise over the largest of the temples.  So needless to say there were heaps of others joining us at this amazing site but the space is vast and although many of the places did feel crowded we were able to step away and find some beautiful quite spots to just sit and enjoy the beauty of these ancient temples.

I am not one who hates being in crowds nor am I one who enjoys being in busy places. If I go to a festival or something like that I think it’s great to see a large turnout to celebrate and enjoy what is going on around you but at the same time I love to get outdoors to get away from the crowds and be able to go for a hike, sit by a fire or on a beach and just enjoy the sound of nature.  With that the crowds really got to me here at first.  To arrive at this amazing location and see hordes of locals trying to sell you different tidbits and 100’s of empty tour buses and local tuk tuk drivers sleeping away while their passengers explored these ruins was definitely a bit of a downer but as the day went on and I had time to think about what these temples really stood for I started to really enjoy the fact that so many people felt it important to come and see this site.  Buddhism I suppose and religion in general is meant to bring people from all walks of life together and this site certainly accomplishes that.  Any event or location that can bring thousands of people from all different backgrounds and with a variety of beliefs together, every day, in peaceful manner is a pretty special place and Angkor Wat certainly does that. 

Those of you who know me know that I am by no means religious but I do feel that try to live by certain core values much the same of many different religions.  Angkor Wat is the largest religious monument and the world and was initially built as a hindu temple for the Khmer empire and as years went on transformed into a Buddhist temple.  Buddhism is built upon 3 Universal truths (Nothing is lost in the Universe, Everything changes and the Law of cause and effect), 4 Noble truths (Suffering exists, There is a cause of suffering, There is an end to suffering and in order to end it you must follow the eightfold path). I think this is kind of neat though when I read through the eightfold path I again understand why I am not one to practice any one given religion but choose rather to live following some of their core beliefs that speak to me.

I have to say there is something special about this place.  As I walked into these temples they really spoke to me; even through the crowds much of the noise and chatter around disappeared and everything remained calm.  There were places where you could truly feel the weight and importance of these buildings as my chest would tighten slightly.  M described similar feelings where she just felt the need to sit or kneel quietly in different places.  It was truly a surreal feeling being in the presence of these structures.

So long Australia

New Years has come and gone and what a year the last one was and what a New Year this is going to be for us.  As we pack up to get ready to leave our Australia home I am taking the time to think back to the chaos that was us getting ready to leave Beaumont for this adventure a little over a year ago.  Kellie taught till Dec 23rd, we met our exchange partners a few days before that and Dec 26th, with our house looking like it was being staged to sell, we were off to explore the world down under.

It has been an amazing roller coaster of a ride and I feel so happy that we put ourselves out there to explore and take this amazing opportunity.

We have done so much and built up so many memories but at the same time we are thinking about all of the things we would still love to do but won't have the time for (or are choosing not to make time for).

As we pack up to leave everything is going slower.  Kellie finished teaching Dec 16th, we immediately left for our final big adventure down under to Tazzie (which was amazing) but since Christmas we've just had time to live, relax, reflect and add details to our next adventure.  It is a really weird feeling, yes we lived this last year in Australia but it wasn't our house, it never felt like our house so it was never truly home.  We will be sad to leave though we will be leaving knowing that 1. We actually can live in a big city and 2. that although we loved being here and the kids thrived here that this isn't the place we want to raise our family.

For the next 6 months we REALLY won't have a home, we'll be living the nomadic lifestyle out of 2 big backpacks and a couple of day packs learning about a new part of the world.  This year we found out that we can live with SOOOO much less stuff in our life and for the next 6 months we will be taking that to a completely new level.  It is exciting and scary and is adding to this weird feeling I have in my stomach as we prepare to leave.  I don't really know how to explain or really understand how I feel it it just feels weird leaving even though we are ready to leave.

But the question now arrises whenever we get back will home feel like home?  The unknown of this question is probably adding to this weird feeling.

Maëlle is getting into french mode it seems and has had enough of a break from learning. Malia has just learnt to ride a bike and is showing that she may be ready to start reading a bit too.  We get to homeschool our kids for the next 6 months (minus the home part). How special is that?!  But will that make us want to continue to do that?  I wouldn't think so but who knows.  More questions...

Professionally for me this has been a hard or rather an odd year.  I find myself thinking more about my business back home and about what life will look like professionally for me when we return home (part of why I started writing this in the quiet of the dark and am now listening to the birds sing as I watch the sun rise on a new day).  Will I coach, will I teach, will I continue as a stay at home day like I did this year or will I do something completely different?  I find myself enjoying writing down my thoughts like this or writing about my cooking adventures and have enjoyed the time I've made for myself to read.  Enjoying writing and reading are weird and new to me but I really want to take more time to do more of both moving forward so hopefully I hold myself to that.  More unanswered questions adding to this weird feeling I have as we prepare to move on.

Even as I write this I feel my perspective on life adapting and I find myself gaining the wisdom that only comes from taking the time to reflect on the opportunities you have given yourself.  My approach to life of "control what you can control and not to stress over the things you can't" is strengthening and developing as is my desire to embrace life and not conform to societal norms (whatever those are).  If you want something more in your life go get it, if you want to experience something new make it happen because you can.  You may not be able to have it all in your life but with a little hard work, planning and vision you can have all that you truly want.

Maëlle has a shirt that says "Childhood is a journey" and I am so glad that my journey involves getting to be a part of our kids childhood.  I also have a shirt that says "At home in the world, just keep living" so maybe this answers one of my first questions and maybe you don't need to live in a home to have a home.  After all isn't "being in a home" what you say when you refer to someone in a nursing home or old age home?  Maybe this weird feeling about leaving Australia is just this deep fundamental understanding, and excitement to put to the test the idea, that when we are together as a family we are truly home no matter where we may be and that when you make time for yourself and your loved ones your life will be rich and complete regardless of the things you have and the money you make.